Just got back from a retreat in Salina a 'lil bit ago. I think the retreat went well overall... It's supposed to be a retreat to sharpen our vision as individuals and as a church... The sessions spoke to me specially the 2nd part about Vision Intention Means.. We all can have great visions for life but without Intention (the doing part), the visions mean nothing...
I started having all kinds of feelings and excitements that I really want to devote myself to The Mission for the last six months I'm here in Wichita. I don't know where God's going to move me after that. Although it doesnt close the door that He may want me to stay here for a 'lil longer than I thought....
When I listened to the sessions, I really had mixed feelings... In one way, I was very excited about what God has planned for the Mission.. I even prayed, You know what God? I'm game for anything You want me to do! Just show me! But on the other hand, I was sad when I looked at my brothers and sisters as we sat at the table and listened to the message. I can only enjoy being around these people for another six months only! Boy, that's too fast!
But then, when we got to the last session, my mixed feelings turned to be a sadness. Pure sadness... We talked about the means that we shall take for the Mission... At that moment, I started to realize that we may not share the same vision all along... It doesnt mean that it is bad.. Not at all... And it's so true what my brothers said that our ministry should glorify God not ourselves. We should follow what God wants not what we want... I completely agree with that. And I totally agree with all the definitions of church and everything as explained during the retreat. I have nothing against that... Because those are true and very biblical....
During the trip coming back home, I started to think about a lot of stuffs... and all these problems that I'm feeling may just be because it's me... I am not saying I want to follow what I want rather than what God wants... But the traditions and the rituals that I have engaged in for the past twenty something years have just been internalized in me...
I'm sure it would be very selfish for me to say what we should do.. Because that means we're not following God's will as a church... However, I also think that I will not glorify God if I follow that vision because I'm not pleasing God in my life, rather, I will be pleasing my dearest friends....
I hope you all will pray for this as we go through some changes.. that the Mission will follow God's will no matter what it is.. and that I will follow God's will and vision in my life, even if it is different than the rest of them....
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3 comments:
God has a different plan for everyone. Perhaps He hasn't made it known to you yet... or perhaps He wants you to find your own path. Won't know for sure until you put your foot forward and start walking :)
Each one of us on this earth is born unique. We do not know what the future reserves us but God only knows. Somtimes we have to go trough a lot of struggle to find the path that God has outlined for us. But remember that God uses those struggles to test our faith and see at what point we are ready to follow Him. So be at peace and remember that for every step u take in life He is there.
May GOD Bless You and be with you everytime and everywhere.
T.
Thanks...
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